5 triviaalset majapidamisharjumust, mis võivad teie suhte rikkuda

5 triviaalset majapidamisharjumust, mis võivad teie suhte rikkuda

You feel like it’s normal, but your partner has had enough and is about to burst.

communication expert, psychologist, author of “How to Live in a Marriage Without Marriage”.

“One of the most common topics for quarrels in a couple is domestic disagreements. Each of us was brought up in our own tribal system. It followed certain rules and traditions. Therefore, when two people decide to start a family, they are faced with different views on the same issue. Hence the conflicts.”

If we look more broadly at domestic quarrels, they are based on a mismatch in their ideas about a husband or wife. Focusing on the experience and example of parents, we form a personal image of how our soul mate will look like. We believe that this is how it should be, because we grew up according to these rules. But in reality it turns out differently.

Before creating your family, it is desirable to discuss in advance with your partner what is important for each of you. Having agreed on all the points, finding compromises, you can reduce the number of domestic quarrels.

Habit #1. Meet your partner unfriendly

Most often it happens that the wife comes home earlier than the husband. It is important how she greets him. Show that you missed him, give him a hug and ask him how the day went. Do not start with recriminations, complaints, interrogations. Aggressive behavior immediately sets up for conflict, because of which the man may then not want to come home on time.

Habit #2. Leave behind a mess

Do you immediately put things away in the closet? Do you collect mugs near the computer? One of the most common causes of domestic disputes is clutter at home. Constantly scattered items cause negative emotions in a partner who is reverent about coziness. Sometimes he may try to keep silent in the hope that the spouse will clean up on his own. But if his requests to put things back in their place are ignored, it will quickly escalate into conflict.

Habit #3. Disrespect the cleanliness of the house

Often in the family there are two opposites: one likes to clean, and the other does not notice neither the balls of dust, nor crumbs on the table. This habit can continue the previous one. Conflict will be inevitable, if after a general many hours of cleaning partner soiled the bathroom or walked in dirty shoes on the cleaned mat. Such behavior is read as disrespect for the efforts of the other half.

Habit #4. Different temperature perception

Who of your couple is always cold and who is always hot? Nowadays, the difference in temperature preferences has become a problem for many families. For example, the wife likes cool, and the husband – warm. This is especially acute in sultry summers and harsh winters. Then disputes begin, whether to leave the window open at night, how many degrees to set the air conditioner? Sometimes this question can be solved only by moving to an apartment with more rooms or a separate bedroom.

Habit #5. Disagreement in waking periods

Another criterion that spouses may not find a common solution is the modes of “owl” and “lark”. One likes to wake up early in the morning, while the other wants to sleep until lunchtime. The conflict is aggravated if the partners try to re-educate each other and adjust to their schedule. This issue is not so easy to solve, because our productivity and health depend on whether we have slept or not. You need to respect your spouse and try not to disturb him/her during sleeping hours.