6 typical signs of self-depreciation and 5 steps to start respecting yourself

 Anna Tadžik

analüütiline psühholoog, psühhosomatoterapeut, treener

“Self-depreciation is a pathological condition in which a person believes themselves to be inferior, incapable or unworthy of success and happiness. It can arise from a variety of causes, including negative childhood patterns, traumatic events, or societal influences. Persistent self-judgment has a negative impact on well-being, relationships, and personal success. It generally impairs a person’s quality of life. Why don’t we value our accomplishments and how can we finally start respecting ourselves?”

How does self-depreciation manifest itself?

Self-depreciation manifests itself in different ways. It can be observed in the thoughts and behavior of a person. What are the characteristic signs of self-depreciation?

  1. Downplaying one’s achievements and qualities. A person believes that they have no value and do not deserve attention. In fact, his successes may be impressive. But there is no objectivity here.
  2. Constant comparison of himself with others. Of course, most often – not in their favor. Self-depreciating people tend to overlook personal successes through the prism of the achievements of others.
  3. Perfectionism. People who are accustomed to devaluing everything in their lives often strive to be flawless. They make the highest demands on themselves. At the same time, they are prone to self-criticism and believe that they can always do even better. Their inner critic is hard to silence.
  4. Avoidance of praise and recognition of merit. Such people often do not believe in positive evaluations of their achievements. They reject compliments, believing that they are not deserved or sincere.
  5. Self-deprecation. A person may talk badly about himself, show a negative attitude toward his appearance or personal qualities. He perceives any achievement in his life in a negative way.
  6. Avoidance of new tasks or challenges. Often self-depreciating people are afraid of failing at challenges, so they avoid them. In this way, they want to eliminate potentially bad experiences.

Remember that self-deprecation can manifest itself in many different ways. It is not a given that exactly these signs or only these signs will be presented. Both the causes and the forms of expression can vary. Above are the typical ones – those that are indicative and are not uncommon.

What is the danger of self-devaluation?

1. Loss of confidence and low self-esteem

When a person constantly devalues themselves, they begin to doubt their abilities and worth. This can lead to low self-esteem and lack of confidence.

2- Limited opportunities and missed chances

Self-evaluation can cause a person to avoid new challenges and opportunities for fear of not being successful or not meeting expectations. This limits his growth and development in personal and professional areas.

3. Prolonged depressive states

The tendency to devalue oneself is associated with constant feelings of dissatisfaction and sadness. This, in turn, can lead to depression or its aggravation if such a state is already peculiar to a person.

4. Poor relationships with others

Personal devaluation can, like a magnet, attract negative attitudes of other people. It is not uncommon for those who suffer from it to become objects of bullying. They have no sense of personal boundaries and cannot defend themselves.
Of course, this affects their desire to communicate with the world. By reinforcing low self-esteem, the person may withdraw deeper and deeper into themselves. The circle closes.

5. Health problems

Constant self-depreciation can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and other mental health problems that later negatively affect a person’s physical health. Stress can also cause problems with the immune system and an increased risk of developing various diseases.

Overall, self-depreciation can seriously limit a person’s capabilities and quality of life. This is why the habit of thinking this way needs to be worked with and gotten rid of. It is important to develop a positive attitude towards yourself and your abilities.

How to stop devaluing yourself? 5 steps

Step #1: Recognize your condition and its impact on your life. In this process, you may need emotional and psychotherapeutic support. It may be worth seeing a professional. A psychological counselor can help you get to the root of the problem and teach calming and transformative techniques.

Step #2. Begin to change thoughts and attitudes. Often self-defeating thoughts are not accurate. Analyzing their rationality will help identify this. Try to notice the negative thoughts and then replace the negative language with positive or simply objective language.

Step #3. Work on self-esteem and increasing self-confidence. Try to focus on your accomplishments and positive personality traits and what you are proud of. Gradually accept yourself with your mistakes and imperfections. No one is perfect, and that’s okay.

Step #4. Take care of yourself. Take time to adopt a healthy lifestyle. Physical activity, proper sleep and nutrition are all important if you value yourself and your life. Regular exercise or yoga will help boost your physical and emotional well-being.

Step #5. Find support. Reach out to friends, family, or professionals who will lend a helping hand. Having people who believe in you is important.

Self-depreciation conflict and resolution is a story that takes time and effort, but it is possible. Remember that you are unique and worthy of love, respect and full fulfillment. Working on improving your self-esteem can lead to better relationships, increased confidence and success in life. Don’t deny yourself what every person who came into this world deserves.

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