What is empathy and how to learn to understand other people? Tips from a psychologist

Catherine of Tours

physician, psychosomatologist, neuropsychologist, anxiety specialist

What is empathy? It is the ability to perceive and understand the emotional state of another person. It implies sympathy and a desire to help. Empathy is one of the most important aspects of social interaction, which provides the possibility of effective communication and conflict resolution, as well as the formation of strong relationships between people.

How to determine your level of empathy and what is needed for its development, if at the moment it is your point of growth?

Why is empathy so important?

From a psychology perspective, empathy is one of the important components of social intelligence, which is responsible for interaction in social groups.

Studies show that empathic people are better able to sense the emotions of others and take them into account in their actions. They read nonverbal cues more subtly and can respond more quickly to changes in the emotional state of others.

Empathy plays an important role in the development of interpersonal skills and social adaptation. When its indicators are high, people establish contact more easily and can more quickly find common ground in various life situations.

It is also important to realize that too much empathy can cause stress and emotional overstrain. Some may empathize too much with others and begin to transfer other people’s problems onto themselves, which can lead to various psychological and emotional problems.

In general, empathy is an important aspect of the psychological development of personality, which is formed in the process of social interaction. It allows a person to better understand others and, therefore, more effectively control their own emotions and behavior in social situations.

6 reasons why it is important to be empathic

1. Interpersonal relationships are improved. Empathy allows a person to better understand the feelings and needs of others, which helps to establish communication, allows you to build deeper and more trusting relationships.

2. conflicts are more easily resolved. Empathy gives an opportunity to put oneself in the place of other people, to understand their motives and, thus, to resolve disputes more effectively by finding a compromise.

3. teamwork. When members of the same team show empathy to each other, it improves communication.

4. Stress levels are reduced. Since it’s about understanding our own and others’ emotions, we have the ability to manage it and make better decisions.

5. Emotional well-being is enhanced. Empathy allows people to feel happier and more satisfied with life because it helps them feel more connected to others.

6. Understanding of cultural differences is improved. When people show empathy for each other, they begin to accept the fact that we are all different. This is normal.

How do you determine your level of empathy?

There are several ways to figure out how empathic you are.

1. Take a test. You can find various options online that allow you to assess its level. They usually contain questions about feelings, emotions, and relationships.

2. Observe your reactions. If you find that you understand other people’s emotions and can easily identify what they are feeling, you probably have a high level of empathy.

3- Evaluate your ability to listen to others. Empathy often manifests itself in this way. If you are able to listen carefully to people and understand their experiences, you are probably quite empathic.

What are some empathy tests?

The test helps to determine how much a person is able to feel and understand the emotions, experiences and needs of others. This method of assessment can be useful for personal development, building relationships, and even choosing a profession.

Since there is no single and official empathy test, let’s look at a few popular options that can be taken online.

1- Baron-Cohen Empathy Test

It is considered to be one of the most accurate and is used in research by researchers. The test contains 60 questions. It should take about 10 minutes to complete. The questions include instances of people’s behavior and requests to express your own opinion on how a person might react.

The result of the Baron-Cohen Empathy Test shows how attuned you are to empathy and intuition. For example, how quickly you are able to recognize emotions on people’s faces.

2. Simon Baron-Cohen Empathy Test.

This test includes 40 questions. It can take 10 to 20 minutes to complete. It is designed to assess the understanding of other people’s feelings and emotions. The questions use many instances of communicators’ behavior, which may be unexpected, there is a certain subtext.

The results of the test show how well you can understand other people’s emotions as well as their communicative intentions.

3- Mary Richardson Empathy Test

This test includes 28 statements to which you must answer: often, rarely, or never. Examples of statements are: “I am imbued with regret when I see the distress of a cow that can’t reach the feeder”, “I suffer when a buddy doesn’t feel well”.

The result of the test shows how often you show empathy in your life.

4- Psychology Today’s Empathy Test.

This test consists of 28 questions covering a variety of situations and emotional reactions. The questions are asked in the form of reprimands and suggestions to test your reaction to other people’s emotions.

5. Nouwent’s Emotional Intelligence Test

This test contains 40 questions and includes modules on recognizing, understanding and managing feelings. The questions correspond to situations in life that require varying degrees of emotional competence.

The result shows your level of emotional intelligence and also provides tips to help improve it.

How are empathy and emotional intelligence related?

The connection here is very close. Empathy is the ability to understand and feel the emotions of others, to “be in their body” and express empathy. Emotional intelligence is about managing your own emotions and understanding other people’s emotions.

However, these concepts have an additional similarity – they are related to the ability to socially adapt and successfully interact with others. Having the ability to empathize (empathy) and emotional intelligence help people understand what feelings are driving a person to certain behaviors, statements, etc. This allows for better communication.

Research shows that emotional intelligence can be developed and this will help to increase empathy.

How to develop emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence (EI) is a person’s ability to recognize and manage their own and others’ emotions. It is a very important skill that can help improve the quality of life – both personal and professional. Here are some ways to develop your EI:

  1. Learn what emotions exist and what they look like. Often people overlook and ignore them, just to avoid facing them. However, to develop EI, you need to learn to recognize emotions – your own and others’.
  2. Recognize your emotions. When you feel something, don’t immediately try to fix the situation. Try to understand what it means to you.
  3. Manage your emotions. Try to find ways to change your behavior to cope with your feelings.
  4. Become a good listener. One of the keys to developing EI is to be able to listen to others. Try to understand. Don’t interrupt. Give feedback.
  5. Learn expression. Memorize expressions that will help you express emotions appropriately. For example, instead of “I’m angry,” say, “I’m disappointed.”
  6. Practice empathy. It allows you to amplify. It will help you understand other people’s emotions more subtly and better manage your own.
  7. Develop feedback. Ask those around you to rate your emotions. This will help you better understand how others perceive your behavior.
  8. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Developing EI is a long-term process. You need to make mistakes so that you can use that experience to pump up your EI later.

Developing emotional intelligence can take some time. This means you need to be patient and persistent. Try practicing and improving your EI on a regular basis. Then you’ll see how it helps you in your daily life.

How to develop empathy?

The answer is obvious – you need to develop empathy skills. How to do it? Here are some tips.

  1. Don’t judge thoughtlessly. Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes and understand why he or she acted this way or that way.
  2. Be benevolent. Respect others. Be ready to support them, listen to them and sincerely help them.
  3. Study theory. Read books and articles about empathy, participate in trainings on developing empathy and communicating with people.
  4. Put knowledge into practice. You can read about what empathy is and practice the technique of interaction at special trainings, but the most important thing is to implement the skill in life. Try to capture the moods and emotions of people close to you and support them in difficult moments.

Empathy is a skill that is important not only for personal relationships, but also for successful socialization. It gives you the ability to better understand others, their feelings and motives, be more tolerant of diversity, and maintain effective communication. This can lead to more favorable outcomes in all areas of life. Being empathic is your choice, and it can make our world a little kinder and fairer.

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