How to believe in yourself in a difficult situation when your hands are down?

Everyone sooner or later faces trials and difficulties. At such times, it is important to be able to turn to your own resources in time. How to do it?

Olga Felsendorff

psychologist at the First Line resort, candidate of psychological sciences

Tells about simple ways to believe in yourself.

Everyone has individual resources, but all of them are divided into two types: external and internal.

Internal resources: self-confidence, self-control, self-esteem, life values, knowledge, emotional intelligence, volitional qualities, physical and mental health, creative thinking, sense of humor, etc.

External resources: living and recreation conditions, sufficient level of material income, security of life, optimal working conditions, stable remuneration, family, friends.

The listed resources are those opportunities and means, mobilization of which will allow you to implement behavioral strategies to overcome difficult life situations. This is the concept of effective coping – the ability to cope with difficulties. It includes the assessment of possible stressors, analysis of problems and available resources, generation of a proposed plan of action, prediction of the probability of the outcome of the activity and the choice of ways of its execution.

Development of self-control. Scientific research proves that effective coping and strategic planning are related to the developed ability to control oneself in the sphere of social behavior, emotions and activities.

Preventive Strategies. The expression that disease is easier to prevent than to treat is familiar to everyone. So it is with crises and stresses. To meet them firmly, it is necessary to carry out daily preparatory work: to lead a healthy lifestyle, to expand social contacts, to form a “fire reserve of funds”, to seek medical help in a timely manner, etc.

Attention management. The ability to consciously switch attention from a stressful situation to an alternative activity: breathing, walking, cleaning the house. All of these contribute to an increased ability to cope.

Seeking support. Support can be both instrumental (advice, information) and emotional (listening, approval, empathy). Asking for support from friends and family during difficult times is one of the most effective coping strategies. If you feel that it is getting harder and harder to cope on your own, do not be afraid to ask for help from others.

Remember that no situation will last forever. Situations have a great property – changeability. Therefore, in some crisis situations it will be useful to take the position of “observer” and just let time pass, and the situation – to change for the better. Even on the ring of King Solomon was written a wise saying: “Everything passes, and this will pass”.

In acute crisis situations, you can use one or more of the above strategies or develop your own. The main thing is to keep an overall positive attitude and remember that you have already coped with difficulties before (i.e., this ability is already trained), and therefore, this time too you will definitely cope.

Working with yourself, aiming for balance, is a contribution that pays off in situations of stress and uncertainty. Learning how to manage your state of mind is crucial right now.

Emotional balance works like an oxygen mask in an airplane – until you come to your senses, until you normalize your condition, it is impossible to make the right decisions.