How to start a conversation if you’re shy. 3 important tips from a business coach

Sometimes we lose opportunities just because we are afraid to start a conversation or are shy to start a communication with a stranger. We offer several ways to get rid of shyness and make the most of opportunities.

Speaker, business coach, author of 17 bestselling books

Tells how to overcome embarrassment and start a conversation with a stranger.

Several ways to start a conversation

It is believed that shyness is one of the traits of narcissism. A person is so reverent about himself that he is terribly afraid of being in a situation where he will be considered non-ideal or rejected. After all, if you don’t talk to strangers, you won’t get rejection.

I don’t think this theory exhaustively explains all the reasons why we shy away from expanding our circle of acquaintances. But I think it’s better to focus not on the question “why am I shy?” but on the question “how do I start a conversation?”.

Small talk is the art of easy, unencumbered conversation “about nothing”.

It can start with a short line about the weather, the environment, common acquaintances. You can offer to help. For example, at a coffee break, say, “The coffee is very good today. Can I get you a cup?”.

Or, if developing the weather theme, say: “What a strong wind outside the window! I think that tree over there might fall on the parked cars.”

With one phrase you will attract attention – in fact, you will create intrigue: will the tree fall or not? People, as a rule, willingly join the discussion – they will evaluate the chances of the tree, remember cases when they themselves were in the center of the hurricane.

If you’re closer to the topic with common acquaintances, try going through it. For example, praise one of them or recall a story that fits the situation.

Choose a topic where you feel at ease – it will be easier to overcome embarrassment. And for the first few lines, don’t talk about yourself. Firstly, this will again help you to cope with the excitement, and secondly, a person who makes a statement about himself from the start, may cause others to feel that he is a braggart.

What to do if you are shy to start a conversation

However, if it is very difficult for you to start a conversation first, use a “backup option”. Honestly admit to yourself: independent dating at parties and on the sidelines of a business forum – not your thing. And ask your buddies to introduce you to new people. This is also a good move.

Another option is to actively communicate with people in social networks, and then translate these acquaintances into real life. As you can see, there are a lot of ways. You will surely find one that suits your needs.

New acquaintances will surely make your life brighter. And in the article at the link told about five more simple things that will help color your everyday life.