Who is a schizoid and why is it difficult to live? 6 behavior markers to check yourself

Quite often complex psychological terms are introduced into everyday vocabulary, but their true meaning remains a mystery. For example, this is what happened with the term “schizoid”. Some directly link it to the disease schizophrenia. Others believe that it is an offensive swear word. Still others understand a little better and realize that they mean types of human personality: schizoid, hysteroid, etc. But here is another problem – most likely, the ideas of these people are outdated.

Clinical psychologist, expert of the online school of psychological professions “Psychodemia”

Who are these “schizoids” and how to be if you find yourself among them?

Let’s immediately dot the “i”. A person with a schizoid personality type is not someone who has schizophrenia. We’re talking about different things! I suggest that we start by understanding what a personality type is, and then move on to sorting out schizoid traits.

About human personality types

The attempt to divide any phenomenon into varieties – categorize, typologize – is a natural step in the process of cognition of the world. To make it easier to study the human personality, psychologists and psychiatrists, observing its various manifestations, tried to organize the information received – to identify types.

Having put the whole variety of phenomena into certain “boxes”, we get an opportunity to study each of them in detail. Why is this type exactly like this, what influenced its formation? What problems do these people face? And, most importantly, how to help them? These are the questions the creators of typologies wanted to answer.

However, the human psyche is a highly complex phenomenon, and the more complex a phenomenon is, the more difficult it is to typologize it. Researchers have put forward a huge number of different systems, but none of them has won the status of the only true. Moreover, modern science is gradually moving away from typologies, as scientific data and practice show that personality cannot be placed in only one “box”. Each person has a set of traits that have a different degree of expression and manifest themselves in their own way depending on the context.

According to modern ideas, a person’s personality is not monolithic, but rather resembles a large family of many components. Thus, schizoid, hysteroid, narcissistic (etc.) parts are present in each of us, but their percentages and sizes vary from person to person.

When one trait is significantly more pronounced than the others, it is called “character accentuation”. I emphasize that we are still talking about a variant of the norm here. When one or more traits are so pronounced that it leads to significant problems in relationships with other people (and in the life of the person), we are already dealing with a personality disorder. Everyone has schizoid traits to some degree, but some have them more prominently.

Character and markers of schizoid behavior

Renowned researcher and psychoanalyst Nancy McWilliams describes schizoid personalities as hypersensitive people who “seem to have nerve endings closer to the surface than the rest of us” (McWilliams, 1998). The world probably seems like a particularly unsafe place to them, so they withdraw into themselves and emotionally withdraw from others to protect themselves. I would emphasize that despite the popularity and widespread use of this psychoanalytic concept, it is still only one view of schizoid processes.

People with this personality type share a number of characteristics:

1. They prefer solitude, avoid public events and social contacts. It’s not that they are afraid. In fact, they are simply not interested. Such a person is more likely to stay at home to read a book or do creative work in solitude, rather than go to a concert or to meet with friends.
2. They have a limited social circle, with difficulty in establishing close relationships. They have a low need for external contacts. They prefer to maintain emotional distance and often avoid intimacy.
3. They seem detached, emotionally cold and aloof. They find it difficult to show tenderness, love, warmth and participation. Low involvement of such people in the relationship can often become a reason for quarrels, because partners are often hurt by their behavior.
4. Often are quite indifferent to intimate relationships, while there may be no problems with achieving orgasm or sexual dysfunction. As mentioned above, they avoid intimacy. Physical intimacy, among other things.
5. They are not oriented to the opinions of others. They are equally indifferent to criticism and praise. They don’t care much about conventional norms. How to look and behave – all this is not too concerned with the schizoid. He is not the kind of person who seeks approval.
6. Often go into the world of their own fantasies, reality for them is not so interesting and reliable. Most of them have a well-developed imagination, so among people with a schizoid personality type can be found writers, artists or musicians. Not inclined to “act”, they nevertheless often express their thoughts and feelings in a creative form.

People with schizoid personality dynamics prefer to observe and analyze the world around them rather than actively participate in it. They pay attention to facts and details, can delve deeply into what they have learned, and are often interested in abstract topics. This is why you can find mathematicians, physicists, philosophers, etc. among schizoid personalities.

It is important to remember that each person is unique. The listed features can manifest themselves in everyone in different ways.

How is the schizoid personality formed?

Like any character trait, schizoidism is formed due to a complex interaction of biological, social and psychological factors. Some role is played by genetics and physiological features of the nervous system (in particular, rapid excitability, sensitivity to external stimuli), some – relationships with significant adults, social experience, culture, beliefs, ideas about the world.

According to Nancy McWilliams, schizoid traits can be exacerbated in two different types of family systems. The first is the hyper-parenting type of parenting. In this case, parents are suffocatingly caring and regularly violate the boundaries of the child’s personal space, which can lead to emotional avoidance (McWilliams, 1998).

The second type is the opposite situation. It refers to emotionally detached loved ones who engage in contradictory or unpredictable behavior. In the search for an optimal behavioral strategy, schizoid traits are sharpened in such a child. Social isolation at an early age also contributes to this.

Disadvantages and advantages of a schizoid

Schizoids have difficulty communicating and establishing close relationships with others. There can be differences here. For some of them, social isolation becomes a problem, for others (with pronounced schizoidism), an existence away from people turns out to be quite comfortable.

Most often, people with a schizoid personality type may turn to a psychologist with the following problems:

1. Depression and depression associated with the absence of a close circle, social isolation and loneliness.
2. Burnout, fatigue, lack of understanding of one’s desires. Schizoid personalities have a problem in recognizing and expressing their emotions, and as a consequence – the inability to notice and satisfy needs in time: from a banal feeling of hunger to the need to rest or change the occupation
3. Difficulties with employment. Inability to adapt to society and interact effectively can manifest itself in the workplace and at job interviews.
4. Lack of romantic relationships. If people with a pronounced schizoid personality disorder may not even be upset about the lack of a partner, then people with accentuation or simply expressed traits most often want to find a second half or build a family. At the same time, classic ways of dating like going to parties or using dating apps can be repulsive to them. Not to mention the fact that close relationships, they are intimidated by the fact.
5. Conflicts with a partner. Schizoid personalities may face rebuke or complaints from a loved one because of their coldness, detachment, or problems with sex. In this case, in addition to individual work, couples therapy works well.

Despite all this, schizoids can have a number of advantages. For example, they are quite assiduous and autonomous. They are suited to activities that require autonomy and the ability to function without constant interaction with others (e.g., remotely).

Schizoid interest in the world of dreams and fantasy is often associated with creative success, and the ability to dive headfirst into a topic, looking for cause-and-effect relationships helps in scientific activity. Some note that schizoid people – calm, meek and quite stable in situations that in other people will cause a strong emotional shake.

How to live with a schizoid?

Do not think that schizoids are soulless people. More often than not, they have a lot of mistrust and feel unsafe in contact with others. The best thing the person next to them can do is not to undermine trust and provide a normal level of respect and care.

It is rather unhelpful to press schizoids for strong emotional involvement, vivid expressions of passion in relationships, great warmth, or public signs of attention. It is simply not in their nature. This peculiarity should simply be accepted.

How to live a schizoid life?

Despite the fact that the article is devoted to a generalized view of the schizoid personality type, it is important to remember – each person is unique. There is no one identical life story. No psychologist in the world can tell a person how to live their life.

If you, after reading this article, suddenly realized that you are schizoid, try to answer yourself the questions:

1. What exactly does this information about yourself give you?
2. How “okay” are you with your schizoidism? Does it hinder you?
3. What problems do you face?
4. Do you need help finding solutions to these problems?

If, in the course of thinking about these questions, you realize that you are experiencing problems and don’t know what to do about them, the most effective solution is to see a psychologist.